Another classic Pancake Night round Alice Can’t Cook Towers.
It’s the same every year so I won’t elaborate but the pictures tell the same old story:
Not sure why I keep bothering, why I think every year might be different? But I have to, I love pancakes, really love them. One year will by MY year…
For the full terrible pancake story read about the night I live tweeted Pancake Night 2014 from my kitchen with the usual results here!
I have a problem with boring food, I always try to jhush it up a bit (well how do YOU spell that word?) which often leads to my downfall.
Take this recent stir fry that went on in my kitchen. To be fair it was barely even that, being just some noodles and raw broccoli in a wok with some oil and soy sauce. I was trying to be good, eating bland, basic food after a weekend of indulgence.
All was going well (boring) until I just thought I had better crack an egg into it all. Why? What’s an egg going to do? It’s hardly going to elevate my boring noodles into a sumptuous Pad Thai is it?
Well I did it anyway and then worried I would end up with raw egg in the broccoli florets and so overcooked the whole lot until it was little more than dry noodles with some crispy scrambled eggs over the top. The broccoli however managed to stay raw – how does it do that?
I ended up eating a Grab Bag of crisps, so indulgence continued…
Not a Pad Thai. Sadly.
And here is how the story unfolded…
Thanks for reading.
I used to have this little egg poaching pan, it had four small plastic tubs that sat in a ring above a shallow pan of boiling water. It was efficient and worked but the eggs usually came out uniformly rubbery and in the the shape of helmets.
Poached eggs need to be cooked direct in water I believe and have always preferred them so, but of course I am unable to make these myself. However, without my little pan and some spinach and bacon in the fridge what was I to do? I had to give it a go…
Here are my poached eggs:
Yes I created a little spinning funnel of boiling water, yes I added a little vinegar, no it didn’t work.
I managed to salvage a whole yolk from this pan of what looks like Chinese soup without any ingredients in and had another go.
This time it worked to a fashion, and so I managed to fashion this:
It wasn’t what it looked like in my head but it was edible.
Look at that little lonely yolk that lost all its whites down the sink…
Just back from my holidays (ate lots of good food).
Just wanted to let you know that normal service has resumed:
I do love a McDonald’s breakfast. I love that adrenaline pumping race to get to the drive-through before 10.30am when the menu changes into boring burgers and fries (usually with a hangover – for which their hash brown is the only real cure in this world).
An Egg McMuffin is a total joy, my son likes them too now, he doesn’t even make me wait until after 10.30am so he can get a Happy Meal anymore.
I decided to make them for us one morning, I mean how hard could it be? I had cheese, eggs and muffins in the fridge.
Away we go… breakfast any time of the day without getting in the car!
Wasn’t sure how to approach the egg (such a specific shape) so broke it into a ramekin, then panicked I wouldn’t be able to get it out again so dumped in some butter too. But how to cook? Microwave? Surely not! Hot water? Let’s give it a go:
This took absolutely ages to get anywhere near cooked, but I waited patiently and put my muffins and cheese in the oven to warm up.
The butter just melted on top of the egg. Which meant that yes I did have trouble getting the bloody thing out:
Tap Tap Tap.
Hmmmm, nothing doing.
Scrape Scrape Scrape.
Oh well, no point crying over broken eggs, or some other similar saying.
At least it’s cooked right?
I stacked it all up and voila:
A not bad at all approximation of an Egg McMuffin. Tasted pretty super too, a must try the next time I have a hangover, although that would still mean going out for a hash brown…
Oh and McDonald’s sorry for any inappropriate use of any words or pictures. Please don’t be mean to me, I know there is no substitute for the real thing.
(Sorry to Coke too for the use of ‘the real thing’ just then – I know that one is yours.)
We called it Gypsy
Anyway, whatever it’s called, it’s bloody good.
Slices of bread (plain white is best) dipped in raw egg and fried up like a Mother’s Pride Omelette.
I forget about it a lot.
But for some reason I thought about it this weekend and said to my son:
‘you should try some Gypsy Toast’
‘or French Toast’
‘Well Eggy Bread’
I was quite keen to share this scrumptious cheap delight with him, but sadly he has yet to taste it in its full glory because I made this instead:
I’ve made a frittata.
Well, I think I have?
I might have just made a rubbish omelette.
I’m not sure.
There was some spinach in my veg box this week and ordinarily I would let it go yellow and crispy before throwing away. But no, not this week… I put ‘spinach recipes’ into the Internet and up came a frittata! I also had eggs and feta cheese in the fridge so I was all set.
I put the spinach in a frying pan to ‘wilt’ or ‘burn to a blackened crisp’ as I like to call it. Boy – that stuff cooks fast right? You just need to show it to a pan and it’s done.
OK, I put some more spinach into the frying pan to wilt this time AFTER whisking up the eggs and herbs and crumbling the cheese. (Lesson learnt)
I then added the eggy mix to the slimy leaves and sort of shook the pan about a bit before adding the cheese to the top.
So far so good.
It still looked like scrambled eggs with bits in and I was a bit nervous about putting the whole shebang into the oven but I followed the recipe and after a few minutes this is what came out:
What the hell has happened to my pan? I’m going to get into trouble for that.
And why has it shrunk so much? I swear it covered the whole bottom when it went in.
It has kind of risen and fluffed up a bit. And there is minimal scorching to the leaves (go me)but it is little more than a glorified omelette… with bits in.
Tasted like it too.
So Alice Can’t Cook is one year old.
It’s the first birthday of my blog and if I may be so bold?
I shall celebrate with a rhyme or three…
Remembering the best and worst of my cookery
So I’ve served raw eggs to an unborn baby
Made a risotto so solid it could have plastered a wall, maybe
My roasted vegetables just won’t roast
But now and again I can have a bit of a boast
My self-imposed Veg Box Challenge was really trying
The hideous shrunken-head celeriac had me crying
I created some fruit compote that ended up in the sink
And a toxic hummous that kicked up a stink
Jamie Oliver’s Fritters won the vote but still got burnt
I’ve been a student but still haven’t learnt
There has been SO much trouble with eggs and rice
But thankfully I have a failsafe dish that usually turns out quite nice
Toad in the Hole nearly burnt the kitchen down
And even an easy kids recipe made me frown
A slimy festive turkey had me skidding across the floor
But my Christmas kit cakes had them crying out for more
Just don’t talk to me about curry!
I either make it like soup or a nasty slurry
My pretend birthday cakes reveal me to be a bad mother
But this years castle creation has made me think not to bother!
I’ve made my dog sick and my son scream
But weirdly my really difficult salmon dish turned into a dream
In the past year I’ve laughed and I’ve cried
I’ve served crap food but still no one has died.
Thanks for reading this year, for all your helpful comments and the laughs!
Alice Can’t Cook (still)…
But She’s Getting Better x
Ah, a day working from home.
You boot up the computer first thing, still in your pyjamas, and send your ‘early email’ just to let everyone know you are up and about and definitely working.
Everyone else leaves the house and you get on to the real business of the day… No, not what daytime TV to watch! What to have for breakfast.
A home alone weekday breakfast is different from the usual yogurt or piece of toast you throw down your throat before you wipe the surfaces and leave for work. You have time to think about it, squeeze some items you’ve got in the fridge, put the oven on, change your mind, make a mess, create…
My favourite working from home breakfasts include:
- Potato Waffles – smothered in salt and vinegar
- Mushroom omelette – here is a classic example of one of mine
- Fried Egg Sandwich
- Oven Chip Sandwich
- Baked Beans on Toast with Cheese (natch)
Here are some of my fried eggs, just about to go into a lovely sandwich. Presentation just does not matter when you are on your own (and still in your dressing gown)
Recently I have found a brand new contender for this list. The potato frittata. Yes, the shrink wrapped tapas tortilla (I have heard you could make them yourself but who would do such a thing?) Simply squeeze out of its wrapper into a hot frying pan, add plenty of salt and pepper and then shove between two massive slices of granary bread. Seriously!
(Look, even a shop bought one came apart on me!)
Serve with a huge, steaming mug of tea in front of the telly, where you can watch all of those funny adverts you’d never normally see for things like Foxy Bingo. I’m often quite tempted to sign up, I used to love
playing Bingo with my Nan when I was little!
But as soon as you’ve finished you remember that you’re meant to be at work and maybe why something lighter like a yogurt or a piece of toast would have been more appropriate…