Sunk By Fish Food

14 Mar

Regular readers will know that I am often subjected to a lot of kids TV. This sometimes spills over into the kitchen as my son and I attempt to recreate what has been made on the telly.

The most surreal of these experiences has been our attempt to make the Fish Biscuits from popular underwater show ‘The Octonauts’.

Most online recipes for this imaginary marine treat include actual fish but when my son and I discussed them we came to the conclusion that they were just simple biscuits in the shape of fish… how hard could it be?

My son was incredibly excited about making these,

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we had read about them, watched them on TV, even sang little songs every time we mentioned them. The day finally arrived… Fish Biscuits Ahoy Matey!

We created a very basic recipe of flour, baking powder, butter, egg, caster sugar and some milk.
Aside from some floury mess, which I will blame on my offspring, we were good to go and with the oven pre-heating we started to get the mix ready for rolling:
I’m not sure what was wrong with it but I think it was too sticky?

Me being me I had had to improvise on some of the measurements and ingredients as the only plain biscuit recipe I could find used cream which I didn’t have, so I am blaming this mess on the lack of cream?
My husband had told me to not even attempt to make biscuits in the shape of fish without a bespoke cutter but we forged ahead using a knife to carve out the shapes. Again, how hard could it be?
Well this hard:
I’m blaming this on the lack of a fish-shaped cookie cutter. I tried to delicately fashion a fishy shape but as the mix was so sticky and kept breaking up we only got two rather abstract looking biscuits out of the whole mix (which was meant to create about 20 in total!) it was so hard to ‘release’ the fish from the rest of the dough.
I told my son that there would be two fish biscuits, one for each of us. And he seemed relatively satisfied as he went off to amuse himself while I put them into the oven and held my breath. I watched them religiously, I didn’t want to burn his attempts AGAIN!

If anything I brought them out a bit early I was so concerned they would crisp up if I so much as blinked.

Here are our biscuits, little pathetic creatures, certainly not fit to be served up on the Octopod. My husband thought that one of them looked a bit rude but I am not going to comment on that.
Sadly on moving to the cooling rack both of their tails broke off. This I am blaming on the baking paper because the biscuits had stuck to it.

So we ended up with four small biscuits of varying shapes. Certainly none of them looked remotely like a fish.

But we ate them while we sang a little song and watched the Octonauts together.

The day after this was posted my husband bought us a set of fish shaped cutters. My son was delighted, informing me that ‘now we could make proper Fish Biscuits’
I wasn’t so delighted, having rather hoped that any future thoughts of recreating them had been cast into the murky depths….

And then my husband and son made these together. Gits.



4 Responses to “Sunk By Fish Food”

  1. Tony 16/03/2012 at 5:41 pm #

    I reckon a straightforward shortcake recipe would do it, just butter, sugar and plain flour. You can just play with the amounts until you’ve got something resembling a pastry dough. Dont roll too thinky. As with many things it’s the thickness that is most important. Tx


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